Failure and Growth

We have a tendency to view life as a straight and narrow journey from point A to a clear and definitive point B.  Our paths are set in stone, concrete, asphalt or whatever other rigid material works for you in this metaphor. The problem is that life is not straight and narrow.  It is actually quite unpredictable with many unexpected bends and curves and multiple forks to be negotiated.

 Even more importantly, there are times when our paths literally crack—when we face situations, such as failure experiences, that stop us in our tracks and leave us questioning who we are, how we understand the world, and our assumptions about the future.  It is truly during these times that the greatest growth can occur. Just as plants grow in the places where roads and sidewalks are cracked, it is often only where/when we are cracked that there is space for growth 

 Your failures do not define you, but they are part of what makes you unique and dynamic.  You would not be who you are without them. When we reflect and make sense of our failures, we learn more about ourselves, our priorities, and what success really means to us.

Kick in your curiosity and check out videos of students and faculty talking about their failure experiences—in connection with the Stanford Resilience Project. Also, this New York Times article offers suggestions for how to fail effectively.

Quotes from Students on this topic:

Appreciate every small victory. As you notice these victories you will feel less of the pain of failure and more of the growth in yourself. A lot of people think that once you’re down the only way to get back up is by complete diligence 100% of the time. This isn’t possible for everyone - some days you will get up at 2pm. Even some progress is progress and even on days where whether by mental health or any extenuating circumstances - get at least one thing done. Odds are the pride in accomplishing that task will get you in the mindset to keep working.

It can feel really lonely and isolating when you feel like you're falling behind your peers, but you're not alone. There are A LOT more people in the same place as you than you realize.

It’s ok to fail. It’s normal. Failing is part of growth. It’s what you do after failing that shows who you are. Take it as a learning point. A flag that indicates your past actions and decisions are not working in favor of your grades or goals.

Failure. It feels like all eyes are on you, and it's easy to assume that everyone is judging you, including advisors, faculty, and staff. They're not. They absolutely want nothing more than for you to succeed. Use every resource imaginable, seek mental health counseling if needed, and do not forget that you are smart and a failure does not take that away from you. Mistakes are a part of life, and there are so many reasons you might be where you are. You are at Purdue, so you are clearly capable. Find your reason, and change paths. You'll find your way back. Everyone wants you to stay and succeed, so don't listen to the internal voices that might tell you otherwise.

 

Bottomline: Failure happens to us all and can be an opportunity for growth!